Hey Guys,

Unfortunately with our last release, and its instability, we were forced to roll back releases. Unfortunately in doing so, it would seem that our notification system has been broken somehow. Our engineers are working on this issue as quickly as possible. We hope to have a patch within the next day, so we can deploy our code and fix the notification system at the same time. Please *bear* with us ;)

Currently all notifications are being queued up so they can be processed as soon as the fix is pushed and verified to be working correctly.

Thank you,

I just filled this page with a lot of complaints and worries and then deleted it all. I needed to vent and did so, but then decided it wasn't worth boring all of you with it all.

Leave it to say that things are tough right now, not only for my family, but for many others and I just hope the best for us all.

General prayers are always appreciated for good things to happen and for peace of mind.

Hugs to all and may your life be one of peace and harmony.

Winter mornings are hard. It seems so unkind to have to wake up when it is so dark outside, and it's nigh impossible to wake up the Youngest Boy (current amount of time spent to get him to full wakefulness: 1 hour). Winter just seems to call out for extra sleeping and not so much work. Bummer about all the housework and the job and all, right?

On the other hand, there's nothing like being indoors to make one realize that one probably out to snow-shovel the junk out of the living room from time to time. So yesterday was spent, in some part, sorting through the piles of papers and books and magazines and music to figure out what ought really to be upstairs, and what should be tossed, given away, or simply stored elsewhere. Tricky stuff, too: does the French horn stay upstairs so that I am reminded that I ought to be practicing, or should it be downstairs so that I don't trip over it every time I walk through the living room?

Also, I'm slowly trying to get to washing all the walls, something I've never before felt the need to do. This year, however, I'm noticing that the walls are covered with a thin layer of something that I'm assuming is dust. So my friend Spic 'n Span and I washed three walls last night--boy, that's an unthrilling chore.

Audience Participation: What big chores are you pegging away at right now?

Okay, so dumb things can make me happy. Today's dumb thing (which may not be so dumb): being able to afford to spend money on MYSELF. I bought dress shoes for me THAT FIT! You have no idea how happy my little girl soul is to have dress shoes THAT FIT properly!

I have to say that Penney's 20% off coupon I got at school made me a very happy girl today. I SAVED more off the regular prices than I spent. The stingy part of my soul is happy with that. And I have CUTE SHOES THAT FIT!

I've had a couple of people ask recently whether I'm doing okay, which makes me a little worried that I am sounding overly emo on posts/status updates/et cetera. I gave some thought to this yesterday, because the truth is that I'm not unhappy or overly stressed--though there is some stress that comes with just trying to do everything right now.

I started thinking about it in terms both spiritual and literary. The best I can say right now is that I feel like God is breaking my heart into smaller and smaller pieces, but it's not a bad thing...it's just a hard thing. And I know that He will bind them up again.

Right now--and by "right now," I mean during the past several months and up to now--I feel as though He has been reminding me of something I knew: He gives generously so that we can give generously (2 Cor. 9:11) and that whoever gives to the poor lends to God (Proverbs 19:17). I know that these scriptures are true when it comes to monetary aid, but I am learning even more how true they are for all kinds of giving. I feel that God is calling me right now to give sometimes what I don't have (patience, kindness, mercy, cheerfulness)--but if I make up my mind to give it, I find that He has given me more than what I have, plenty to give away to others.

In literary terms, the beginning of the school year brought conflict between self (me) and environment (a new job). That continued for a while, but now the conflict is between self and self: my expectations, my idea of what and who I should be, my yardsticks of success.

Are things bad? Not at all. Am I unhappy? Not at all! But there is so much happening internally that sometimes I am sure I seem as though I must be flailing. Take heart! Things are beginning to click into place, and my natural buoyance is bobbing to the surface more often.

I just discovered an awesome website: everynote.com. If you're looking for old music, that's the place to go! I've been hunting for The Publican for ages and just found it to download on everynote for $1.86! Can't beat that!

So, now my piano-playing fingers have new music to play. *bliss*

"Oh I wondered where that was." "I wonder if that still works?" "Does this key go to anything?" "Why is this here?"

These were just some of the comments made this morning as I packed up most of the items in my desk drawers. Funny the things you run across. I found things I was sure were lost, discovered too many things that were just trash and others I wasn't even sure what they were for. Mind you we have only lived in this house for 5 years, but I guess that's enough.

I was also curious at all the buttons I found in there. Evidentally I just toss buttons into drawers in passing. I also discovered some game pieces, which I will have to run to the garage with and put into those boxes. I may not know which game they are for, but at least they'll be closer to home.

The only consolation in having these hooligans from 8:15 until noon without break is that I'll only have them for about 20 minutes - no 15! They have an extra 5 minutes today! - and then I give them away for music, have them for a half hour for math, then I give most of them away for a half hour for STAR, then it's time to pack up and go home.

Now, I have a whole bunch who owe me some recess, so I must HUNT THEM DOWN.

I was reading a piece by Charles Swindoll today in which he wrote about the death of Stephen Foster as a pauper. He wrote about the people we meet who are hurting may look like, well, just people. We can't always see that "...the song in their heart is dying, because no one knows, and no one cares."

That made me think of Isaiah 42:3 "A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out."

How quick we are sometimes to snuff smoldering wicks! Think about a candle that has just been almost completely extinguished, with just a spark glowing at the end of the wick. The smoke rises in a plume, and often that plume of smoke is irritating or annoying. In the same way, sometimes we find ourselves irritated by people whose fault is primarily that their song is dying inside, their wick is being snuffed out.

We dismiss them as needy, as attention-seeking. We ignore them, feel uncomfortable around them, wish they'd get over it or become more interesting or be more fun. All we see is how they affect us. What we do not see is that they are silently crying out for someone--anyone--to listen, to notice, to care, even a little bit. Sometimes, the people that try us the most are the people who need most whatever grace we can extend.

There are some children who try my patience. They are naughty, obnoxious, even annoying. Sometimes, they're my own children. Sometimes, I have to be unpleasant, at least for a moment, and step in to correct certain behaviors. But along with that has to come some grace, too. Once it's been corrected, I have to extend the grace of "forgetting" about it the next time we interact. After the storm should come the calm. After the boom is lowered, there has to be left room for a fresh start.

I'm writing this in spurts while my son talks to me. Just after the Older Boy and his dad leave in the morning, this Younger Boy really comes further awake and is in a chatty mood. He doesn't so much want conversation, he wants to tell me things. He is not the only one who wants to tell me things--all day long, children tell me things. They tell me about loose teeth. They tell me about their puppy. They tell me about the shark in the book they're reading. They tell me who "cutted" who in line. They tell me, tell me, tell me.

Sometimes, especially when I am trying to concentrate on something, I want to say, "Not now! I'm busy! Don't talk to me unless you have something to say!" But surely that might be crushing a bruised reed, snuffing that smoldering wick. I don't know how the song in their heart is doing, whether it's swelling or waning. I only know that I need to act as though there is a possibility that I am the only one who listens, the only one who cares.

Let us be gentle with one another. Let's fan those glowing sparks, not squash them. Let us encourage one another and extend the grace we have been given.

Today I had an hour or so with no homework I had to do, so...I put away some laundry and cleaned off my dresser. The dresser had been heaped with things every time we came back from a trip or from church or from work or...you get the idea. It looks so much nicer now, though it's not been dusted or anything.

It's hard to pull my thoughts together these days; I expend so much effort in being "Mrs. Rowland, Media Center Clerk to the Stars" and "Mom!" and "Sweetie" that I'm really scrambling for leftovers when it comes to "Friend" or "LJer" or "Pen-Pal."

Not that there isn't thought going on. I'd really like to write something--essays, a book?--about my first year of working in a school. Who knows, it could be my only year of working in a school, but I won't think of it. Still, how do I write something new, fresh, and different? But there are thoughts there, and connections...if only I can hold onto them long enough to turn them into something lovely and new.

LiveJournal: The First Decade

Just in time for holiday shopping, we're thrilled to announce the release of our ten-year anniversary anthology. Published by Blurb.com, the book showcases a decade of extraordinary talent drawn from LiveJournal users around the world. This must-read compilation features stories, memes, photos, comics, editorials, graphic content, and more, including:

1. Excerpts from Oh No They Didn't (a/k/a ohnotheydidnt), the largest community on LiveJournal, covering celebrity gossip, entertainment news, and pop culture
2. A look at post-Katrina New Orleans from the journal of Poppy Z. Brite
3. Gripping narratives, including a poignant reverie on a blind date
4. Photography that spans the globe, ranging from old-fashioned Polaroids to underwater photography
5. Mouthwatering dishes from food_porn

What began as a late-night inspiration back in Brad Fitzpatrick's college dorm in 1999 has grown to encompass nearly 25 million users worldwide, with journals and communities covering every conceivable hobby, passion, and topic. To get your copy, please visit the Blurb Bookstore. For updates and entries from book contributors, please join lj_turns10.

Tweaks and enhancements

• You can now ban a user from all of your communities and journals at once. To access this feature, hover over the person's userpic and choose Ban user everywhere from the drop-down menu.
• Follow LiveJournal on Twitter!

Give a little to help a lot!

In honor of National AIDS Awareness month, we've added a new charitable vgift. For each red ribbon you purchase for $2.99, we'll donate 100 percent of gross proceeds to IAVI.org (the International AIDS Vaccine Initiative) to support the development and global distribution of an affordable HIV vaccine (we'll cover credit card fees). You can read more about IAVI at lj_cares. While we're on the subject, we raised $740 from our November fundraiser for Love Without Boundaries, which supports emergency healthcare and adoption of Chinese orphans. We thank you for helping us help others.

Photos of the week

We're back with more incredible pictures from our super-talented LiveJournal photographers. Congratulations to ilya_gorokhov, who is the winner of our very first lj_photophile poll.

We hope you'll continue to post, vote, and comment! A gentle request: Please post only one photo at a time and limit size to 350x350 (so images display properly on friends pages). And now, without further ado, get ready to cast your ballot and view more awesome user content after the jump!

( Read more... )

Curtains

Thanks, again, for joining us. Stay safe and snug out there!

Yesterday I felt the world crushing me into a million pieces. I felt like those little dust particles that dash here and there around the room when the sun shines just right through the window. One more breeze and I might just float away into oblivion.

You see with the short sale now dragging into its sixth month, finances being at their maximum, Robert trying to struggle through sales in a state that is at the bottom economically, packing, dental that costs a fortune even with insurance and finally, knowing I have to put my dog to sleep... well you get the picture.

Last night, as I lay in bed my board of directors (my mind) decided to get into a serious debate. As I strategized, wept, puzzled and thought I was going to have a heart attack, I realized I wasn't looking in the right direction. I needed to turn to God.

It's funny how quickly God can turn things around. As I laid out my problems, asked for guidance and for God to show me my sin; something happened. I was washed over with peace and my mind went quiet. It's not like it is a new experience for me, but each time it happens in my life it feels like a miracle.

When the alarm went off this morning I did not want to get up, but my mind was at peace and by noon I had a new plan of attack for our issues. Though I know I allowed myself to drop into this abyss, I also know that God will not give me more than I can handle and sooner or later (in God's time) the clouds will clear and my fractured little particles will once again allow me to settle into a calm place..

I am so close to being done with this semester of school. And while I know that my reprieve will only be brief, I am ready for it. Of course, I already have a long list of Things I Need To Do Over Winter Break, but most of them I can do in my pajamas, so that's a nice thing to think about. I can also do them barefoot, which is another little bliss waiting to happen.

I spent about three hours last night on a 16-point assignment for my Cataloging class, looking for technical errors in records for various items. We were told that there were 34 errors to be found, but not told whether that counted the one that she did for us as an example...I'm not totally content that I found the correct 34, but I did at least find 34.

It will give you insight into my head to know that I had a 100% average in this class until last week, when I missed one point on an exercise. I could retry it for better (it allows multiple attempts), but I decided for the sake of my sanity not to. Every time I open my grades online, though, that little 309/310 total grade bugs me.

Youngest Boy: "Except I don't know how you grow a college...but I'm guessing it takes a loooot of water."

There's nothing like sitting down in front of a kindergarten class and having the screws fall out of your chair.

Unless it's sitting down in front of a first grade class and realizing that your zipper's undone.

Don't dare your teacher to call Mom.


I'm just sayin'.

**EDIT Thu Dec 3 23:24:15 UTC 2009 **

Hey Everyone, we are about to run the last alter job that we need to on our database servers. This will effect userpics / scrapbook / vgift images for the next few hours. Have no fear, your images aren't lost, there is just a really intensive process running on the servers which store the information for mogilefs. Thank you for your understanding and all the LJ love...

Hey LJers,

I just wanted to let you all know that we are going to be performing some mogilefs maintenance over the next few days. We will be upgrading our current version to latest stable as well as changing some db config information to better handle the amount of files we are currently hosting. This shouldn't cause a big impact on site stability, but you may see some minor delays with userpic / scrapbook images appearing or other requests associated with our mogilefs. We would love to not have that happen, but unfortunately with some of the steps we need to take we have to cause a delay with images. I figured this was a better solution than taking down all of LiveJournal because well lets face it, we all need our daily LJ fix ;)

Thanks,

What I heard: Now that we're into Summer...

What she actually said: Now that we're in December...

So I apparently have bunions, which is why my feet hurt all the time? Time to hie me to a podiatrist.

Thanksgiving is now over and so is the last of my having company in this house, so today is the beginning of seriously getting into packing. Yes, I have been doing it all along, but not really anything major was boxed up.

This morning I gathered all my Autumn decorations and boxed them. I have two plastic tubs of them and it was kind of sad taking them down. Now I can focus on all the pictures on the walls and boxing up the china and the rest of the crystal.

The living room will then become box central. It will be the room that ends up with all the over flow furniture and boxes that are not going into the garage. I have approximately 50 days to get it all done.

The only thing holding me up now is that Roger and Robert decided to build a computer this weekend and there are 4 monitors and computer body parts all over the floor of my dining and living room. They have vowed to clear the mess this evening, but we will see.